Blog 9 - Happy New Year - Brain Collapse & Designing 2012

Hello party people! Hoping everyone has been enjoying the festive season & the psychological relief that always seems to be associated with reaching the end of a year. 

Personally after a very intense but immensely rewarding & successful work period over the last few months, I have collapsed in a heap; literally, my brain has turned to mush. Normally I’m uber charged powering through the day like a tribesman cutting a path with a machete in a rainforest…but I’m just mush. I am sure it is some self-correcting reflex in our bodies, the brain / body just kind of goes on strike because it knows better. Anyways, this time of year is always a bit of review, regroup & forward planning time for me & my partner David.

We try to plan out & lock into the calendar key activites, review our goals, priorities & put out a vision board. David & I are blessed (well not really, we chose!) to have access to a great group of peers & professionals from the “Anthony Robbins” personal development / coaching programs we have invested in over the last few years, so there has been a bit of chatter around us to tap into for formulating plans etc for 2012 & remind us how important this process is.

Two great resources we have tapped into were a VISION BOARD coaching webinar by fellow West Australian Katie Joy the “Global Butterfly” and some TIME MANAGEMENT clips from Scott Harris "Millionare Mentor", a super QLD coach I was fortunate to have instruct my last module of Anthony Robbins study in Fiji, early 2011.

Katie’s Vision Board webinar session was about how you can create something like a bit of a poster with pictures & words all over it that is basically your idea of what you want to achieve, focus & produce in the year ahead – its all based on your prime values of what’s important & where you want to focus. David & I have been using vision boards for a few years & we love them as a tool. Katie’s webinar session is only available for a short time via her coaching club, which you can subscribe to for free at http://www.wow-notes.com/

Katie Joy "The Global Butterfly"

Scott Harris “Millionaire Mentor”– who is an extremely capable personal coach & appears from the outside to me  to deeply have skill & mastery in most areas of his life, put out 3 great video clips on planning & time management for 2012. He started off with a GREAT analogy of 2012 being like a camping adventure he was packing for, with lots of luggage but limited space & he had to decide what goes in & comes on the trip & what gets left behind….my brain works this way so I really got it. For any of my close friends you will know I am a time management driven person, so Scotts session firstly made me feel normal I do this stuff !! & secondly reinforced the importance of it. You can check these out at http://www.scottharris.com.au/blog/merry-planning


Heres Scotts introductory clip on the CAR PACKING metaphor - love it ! I also love that he appears to be driving a 4WD Porche (i think?) for his family camping trip. Priceless.

So combining the two resources we have used Katie’s Vision Board session with our big picture of clarifying desires & lifestyle we want to cultivate based on our values, then Scotts time management sessions help with the execution of the year & how we are going to take constant steps towards achieving the Vision Board pictures.

Bring on 2012, and if not doing so already- invest some time in planning yourself & take control of the reins….

Mwah xox Kallista

PS. My New years eve party name is Kalypso – what’s yours ?

Blog 8 - Survival Tip from "Bear"

Do you watch “Bear Grylls” ? 

He is the sensational British ex Special Forces guy that films himself in extreme survival situations & gets himself out alive with very limited resources. My husband and three young boys are riveted by his films, & apart from being quite handy for picking up the odd survival tip in case I am ever stranded in a crocodile infested Mississippi swamp etc I actually picked up a HUGE pearl of wisdom from our mate Bear whilst watching recently…. 

He said ….( are you ready for this)…he said that “the key” to survival – as taught to him by one of his own trainers… was to avoid the rollercoaster of emotions, avoid extreme highs & lows, to try & control your emotions to a steady place somewhere in the middle as extremes are way to taxing from a survival point of view.

Bear !! Thanks buddy !  I seriously LOVE this one, it is just SOOOOO true. Although we wouldn’t be without some extreme joyful highs & the horrible lows propel us back up into action & give us lessons, his advice for operating on a sustainable day to day life survival point of view is very relevant. 

Happy to be turning 42, 
bring on 43 ! Taken with our 
youngest little man Beau.

I recently allowed myself to be really negatively emotionally affected by the behaviour of some people around me & seriously, it took me days to recover. It was like a bad emotional hangover that lasted days. I was so annoyed at myself for allowing it to happen because I thought I was more resilient ! But once you go there with those emotions, even though you can mentally rationalize why you have responded this way from a “needs  psychology perspective” its really hard to turn off the chemical affect in your body of the hormones that come with a real emotional upset.

So I turned 42 yesterday, & was reflecting on how things do feel easier as I age & really enjoy aging because of the sensibility & emotional fitness we develop as we age. So I thought, what really useful things should I re-focus on for my 43rd year to continue to develop the feeling of “things being easier”…

       1. Bear’s advice of avoiding the extreme highs & lows…PLUS the other three that are already on my shower wall:

       2. Anthony Robbins advice of “Quality of your life is the quality of your emotions” (don’t go to the rotten ones) .
          3.  Pat Parellis advice of “always putting the relationship first” before the objective you are trying to achieve (Relationship mastery is #1 for me).

           4. Linda Parellis advice of trust in fate that everything that happens (good or bad) is perfect & the way it should be (Every cloud has a silver lining).

What do you think about Bear’s words of wisdom on survival tips & do you have any useful “juicy” ones to share, please tell.

xoxox

Kallista

Blog 7 - Time Flies: So how are you living it ?

Yesterday my family celebrated the 5^th birthday of my twin boys. Frankly how quickly that 5 years has gone was really a wake up call.

It’s been a full on 5 years but the “twin / child” component in there has only been a small part of what I am referring to as “full on”. Like most – my last 5 years hasn’t been without life highs and lows and some really, really challenging periods that we just have to find a path through.

But reflecting last night around 8pm - the time the twins were born, I could remember that moment crystal clear, I then found myself reflecting on what our family circumstances were 5 years ago…. then what they were 5 years before that, then chunking back another 5 years and remembering what was going on 5 years before that, I kept chunking back 7 times until I got to when I was age 6 (I am 41 now) and really the whole lot was crystal clear!

Our twins Kele and Beau, turn 5.
How will these little guys "chunk back"
in time and remember their life.

It quite amazed me – firstly how when you look back retrospectively how time really does fly but more so – how at each “5 year point” it seemed there was always some challenge on my plate and how at the time those challenges seemed difficult but at 41 looking back most seem easy by comparison of what my “challenges” are today. How interesting….

So my point is, clearly we will always “feel” like we have challenges – its normal life, but because time does fly we had better be careful how we are living through those challenges. It would be so awful if our broad memory of things is one whole excruciating painful challenge !

So last night as my twins turned 5 it was just a lovely little “juicy” raising of my own consciousness of how I am living through my completely normal day to day challenges that will always be there and made me realise to just make the process - my life - happy, not one long excruciating painful challenge.  xoxoxo

Blog 6 – Trait # 4 – Precious Juicy Women "Emit Warmth".

It's been a month since my last posting and Ive had a fab and very full month.   Even though Ive been super embedded in my current projects and family life I’ve noticed since starting this blog I’m far more observant of the sorts of behaviours that delightful & very successful women around me possess. Today I must include “emitting warmth” as a key trait that “Precious Juicy Women” possess, and boy it is a beautiful one that truly serves them and their community well.

Isn’t it lovely when someone shows you warmth ! Its just got to be one of the most giving, confidence building and engaging things you can do for someone.  Simply giving a warm, genuine friendly greeting – even if it is in passing on the run, is so kind ! I have been on the receiving end of this, and then on the receiving end of a not so warm acknowledgement  and the latter can make you extremely uncomfortable and even for a confident person - a bit paranoid !

The women I observe consistently emitting warmth - attract people like bees to a honey pot – as others simply feel so secure in their presence – being around them is a “happy place” – what a gift they give others – especially the more vulnerable and insecure in our circles. I just so admire & appreciate these women who have a hugely positive impact moment to moment on their social network PLUS I also see how well it serves them.

I can think of two women in my closer circle of friends that are constantly & genuinely programmed this way and wonder what forces in their lives have shaped them to be this way and what forces have shaped others that aren’t. Anyways, it’s a behaviour I aspire to and love them dearly for, hopefully just noting this will raise my level of consciousness about this trait and ensure I practice it more often – why wouldn’t you !! Can you think of people in your own circles that are so giving in this way and see the positive impact it has on you and the more “vulnerable” others around them ?

xoxo

Blog 5 - Introducing Gerlinde & her magic “DELETE BUTTON”

Me & Gerlinde (2008)

The first of my “Precious Juicy Women” friends I’d love to introduce is my long time friend from Margaret River, Australia, Gerlinde Watson. I adore Gerlinde unconditionally, she’s one of those friends you can go for long periods without talking, can be completely honest with no fear of being judged and someone to turn to for support in a real crisis. GOLD. Gerlinde is so natural, objective, intelligent, is General Manager of a big wine industry company, handles huge responsibility and pressure, is passionate about gardening and dressage riding, and in my observation – passionate about living life on her terms.

Gerlinde and one of my boys Beau,
pottering around her veggie garden. 

One of the most valuable gifts of wisdom Gerlinde has given me is the idea of a “DELETE BUTTON” !! One time I was staying with her, we were talking about stuff she was doing to change her life at the time - simple tweaks to increase her happiness. One of these areas was WASHING DISHES ! - she resented washing up dishes after a long days work, and they accumulated in piles as she invested her precious available time in other things. Her exact words were she was going to “PRESS THE DELETE BUTTON” on washing dishes and she was going to buy a dishwasher - a really simple change she could make immediately to make a positive impact on quality in her life.
  

Gerlinde riding Indigo, one of her
Warmblood dressage horses.

Yeah! – I loved her idea of a DELETE BUTTON – it totally resonated with me and I started to consider all the things I could press the “DELETE BUTTON” on in my life too, and there were lots. That was about 10 years ago and I still think about the delete button regularly and as I get older and design my life more and more into the shape I want it to be I have become very selective about what I do, who I let into my life and what I let impact me. The concept of Gerlindes “DELETE BUTTON” is always present as a quality control tool in my little bubble of a world. 


Another take on this “delete button”  idea was reinforced again just recently as I read a comment from Linda Parelli  (Parelli Natural Horsemanship teacher). Linda was reflecting on the idea that the brain absorbs things unconsciously – almost like osmosis just by being exposed to things regularly. She used the example of how as a kid she never participated in her mums cooking lessons yet as an adult her mums style of cooking and healthy approach to food completely rubbed off on her. This revelation reinforced to her the importance of being careful as to what / who she exposed herself to as it would rub off on her brain, and as I read, it raised my awareness greatly of the importance of protecting ourselves from “rubbish” which can pull us off course or away from our beliefs. So again Gerlindes “delete button”  is so relevant as a way to protect ourselves in daily life.


These ideas are very congruent with the concepts of “The Secret” which is a DVD about the “Law of Attraction”. Put very simply it says – what you think about and focus on- good or bad, you attract – so be careful …the finger should be always very close to “Delete button” and used liberally.   

So thankyou precious Gerlinde, what a wonderful “Juicy Living” concept.  I really hope lots of people can pinch this idea like I did and are busting to rush off now to press that “DELETE BUTTON” with conviction to refine quality levels in their worlds too. xoxo

Blog 4 - What makes your Atoms Fizz ? (Precious Juicy Women Trait #3 – Consuming Passions as a Driving Force)

After activities that meet basic survival needs such as generating income for food & shelter and essential roles such as parenting etc, what really gets your atoms fizzing and makes you move – in a hurry, with momentum and juicy massive enthusiasm? For me and in my observation, for my “Precious Juicy Women” friends it’s CONSUMING PASSIONS.

I find that when you focus on your passions and integrate them into your daily rhythm – including if you can - what you do for a living – you tap into a massively positive force of energy and productivity flows almost effortlessly. For example – picture in your head the struggle of a fish trying to swim upstream, then imagine turning that fish around and watching them get instantly swept off down stream just by the flow of the current – they wont even really have to swim – just correct their direction and make sure they breathe!! That is kind of how tapping into consuming passions on a daily basis affects my productivity.  I just get swept off by my juicy current everyday and stuff a tremendous amount in without much force on my part. In fact most days the only thing that makes me put “tools down” is that I’ve lost daylight and cant see outside anymore and have to switch hats to tend to the needs of my family. 

I see this beautifully in action for a lot of my ““Precious Juicy Women” friends also as I observe women – some with immense family loads taking on huge enterprising / corporate challenges and responsibilities who in my view are driven by their own personal passions.

As one of my mentors/ teachers Anthony Robbins says “emotion = motion”. It really is about tapping into passion. There are other forces in play such as human needs and values etc and in some psychology circles these passions are referred to as  “the Why” or a “Quality World Picture” or “Blueprint”  I’m not fussed what the technicalities are, I am only concerned with HAVING THEM as they act as a juicy driving force in my life and I know cause me to move almost on autopilot. 

Of course for people who’s lives are being dominated by some other forces now such as such as ill health, grief, financial difficulty, relationship strife or are living in an environment under threat such as war etc, this will sound indulgent and luxurious and wont be a priority. But you also have to ask, what part does these consuming passions have in retaining wellness on all levels and contributing to a more harmonious world. I’d like to think that living my life driven by consuming passions, I am contributing more positively to quality in the world.

In conclusion, the  purpose of sharing my views on "consuming passions as a driving force" is that if you feel like you don't have much MOJO or JUICE going on in your life, perhaps reflect on what might turn you on, latch onto it and use it as a driving force for good. It will transform your life and get you moving like that little fish being swept downstream. You will also feel like your life has purpose, is meaningful, is progressive and that the "work" you are doing everyday really is worthwhile, it certainly does for me.

Blog 3 - The day I rang Janet Holmes a Court [ Trait #2 of Precious Juicy Women – They're Brave ].

I’d love to share a story which demonstrates well the payoff we usually get when being brave and stepping outside our comfort zone…its “living juicy” and has always served me well.

Way back in 1995, I was a slim 25 year old running an exclusive 6 room guest house in the Margaret River Wine Region of Western Australia. One particular weekend we were approaching the annual Margaret River Wine Festival and the guest house was fully booked for both nights of the weekend  – most accommodation in the region was. The main owner of the guest house rang me a few days before the weekend to ensure we were fully booked and indeed that we were holding deposits to secure all bookings. We were except for 2 rooms for 2 nights. I cant recall why and remember being a little nervous – but then again who was going to cancel their precious accommodation for THE Margaret River Wine Festival !!

Well Murphys Law kicked in and yes I received a call from the room that hadn’t paid a deposit and they were cancelling both rooms for both nights !! OMG, it was Thursday – I was never going to resell those rooms at such late notice and this was way before LASTMINUTE.COM!!

I was, as we say in Australia, “Up s__t creek without a paddle…” What was I going to do, I was definatley going to get my rear end kicked big time by 3 unhappy owners and needed a plan to rebook those rooms fast. After implementing a number of strategies immediately which I knew would probably not result in reselling the rooms, I came up with a radical idea I just thought was worth a try…to phone Janet Holmes a Court in Perth (Australias wealthiest woman at the time) and see if she wanted to book the rooms ! Of course, I didn’t know her nor did I have any contacts to her. But there was a bit of logic in my idea...

One of the exclusive events for the festival was a “Winemakers” dinner which this year was to be held at Vasse Felix Winery – the regions first winery and owned by Australias Wealth “A” Lister” Janet Holmes a Court. I had her set in my sights some time earlier as a prospect as we were heavily targeting the corporate retreats market where firms booked out the entire lodge midweek for a few days – it was big $$ and I knew her company had executive retreats and wanted a way to get her at the guesthouse to “instantly fall in love with it” and choose us as her preferred future venue –  we were practically neighbours with her winery Vasse Felix and our lodge was similar in building materials / vibe so I believed she would love it.

So sitting there with my empty rooms I wondered – did Janet have plans to come down to the prestigious winemakers dinner to be held in a couple of days at HER winery Vasse Felix, and if so – did she have accommodation booked ?. 

So I got out the fat old white pages and looked up her company number.  I came up with the words I would use if I got through, practiced it a few times until I was ready and then with my “script” in front of me dialed the numbers… it was ringing - my adrenalin spiked ...then a switchboard lady answered….blah, blah “Yes I’m calling for Janet please” I said (as if I was a personal friend !)…”Hold the line please” was the answer…my adrenalin spiked even more as I got through – was the next person going to be Janet herself ? “Janet Holmes a Courts office…” was the answer “Yes, I’m calling for Janet please” I said again in the personal friend tone that seemed to work before “May I say who is calling?” was the response “Its Kallista Bolton” I replied !…”one moment please” the secretary said !! OMG the next person was definatley going to be JANET !! …about 30 seconds passed then the secretary came back to me…”Mrs Holmes a Court is in a meeting, can I tell her what it is about”….so I reeled off my speel – very fast….it was a clear and assertive message that I had a last minute cancellation of 2 rooms for 2 nights for the wine festival weekend, that I wondered if Janet had plans to come to the special dinner at her winery ? and if so did she already have accommodation booked ? and if not that I was sure she would love my guesthouse because it was very private and felt a lot like Vasse Felix !!! (which I knew from my research was a favourite of hers in her business empire). “Ok”, said the secretary, “I will pass the information on to Mrs Holmes a Court and let you know.”

I put down the phone, with an afterglow of adrenalin, thinking, well at least I gave it my best shot, and rated my chances of getting a call back at about 12%. About 30 minutes passed and the lodge phone rang. “Hello Kallista, this is Janet Homes a Courts secretary (I forget her name)” “ah yes” I replied ready for the polite knock back…thinking how nice of her to at least call… then was completely shocked to hear the next words…”Mrs Holmes a Court thinks it’s a great idea and she would like to book both rooms for 4 nights if possible, she wants to bring some friends and have a bit of a getaway after the festival ?”

OMG, OMG, OMG, yes it worked, yes I filled the rooms, and YES Janet was coming, PLUS booking more rooms and more nights than I had even hoped. [There was just one catch, she wanted to bring her lap dog and I would have to stash it at my managers cottage as it was against health rules to have dogs on site. I sorted that and was happy to personally babysit Janets pooch]. Anyway, the weekend was great, other guests thought they were in “High Roller World”, the owners were stoked and YES Janet fell in love with the lodge and went on to use it as her executive retreat venue.

This moment in 1994 really was such a great lesson for me. I was so scared to make that call but it sooo totally paid off tenfold compared to my fear. It is something I have repeated again and again in my life in business and socially and have a clear belief that stepping out of your comfort zone, always extends you and you usually get paid off big time.  If you don’t then at least you don’t experience anguish over what you “could have done” to get a different result.

These days if I am ever in a situation of making a scary call I often remind myself – hey I called Janet...I can do this – this person I am calling is no where near as scary. So thankyou Janet for teaching me such a great lesson – I wonder if that was her intention – because really, if you look at it from her point of view it was a pretty bold move on my part – who knows - perhaps she wanted to reward it.

Anyway, this harnessing courage is definatley ”juicy living” and something I see my “juicy friends” doing regularly. So next time you are faced with a scary challenge – perhaps think of a time in the past you have been brave and it has paid off for you or just remember my call to Janet to summons the courage too xoxo.

[To share this story with others that may benefit from it, click on the little F for facebook in the green rectangle below and it will be posted to your facebook page for friends to see the link !]
Coming soon Blogs - Trait # 4 - Consuming Passions as a Driving Force.  Trait #5 - They are highly Organised, some even Set Goals! Trait #6 - They are committed to Continuous Self Improvement. 

Blog 2 - Trait # 1 of Precious Juicy Women - They Connect with Other Women.

Precious Juicy Women are perfectly easy to identify. They surround themselves with lots of women. They intuitively know they are nourished from other women, it is a reflex for them to seek and befriend other women. I can pick one out in a crowd easily and usually find myself drawn into their magnetic field. Sometimes they are extrovert and a little noisy, seem to be on a high with sparkles and smiles twinkling around them, sometimes they are quiet, observant and just very present in their moment listening to the women around them processing information. They are old or young, but are always immersing themselves in a circle of women.They also cultivate a circle of treasured women friends they care for unconditionally, trust and can call on when in need. 


Ways these women connect: they use social media tools like Facebook,  email or text with phones to connect with multiple women on mass, they step up to collaborate on groups or committees where they have to invest time together, working co-operativley forging relationships, they welcome women into their homes and personal space inviting friends over spontaneously and regularly, they arrange or engage in social outings or adventures, retreats, mini holiday etc etc. 


This trait and actions meet an essential survival need for connection so if you are not already connecting with women on a regular basis and cultivating a "circle of trusted ones" to support you in life start investing some time and effort into it on an ongoing basis as this is a definate trait of Precious Juicy Women. If this is true for you, please share and inspire others about how investing in this type of connection nourishes, serves and supports you in your world. 

Blog 1 - Calling All Precious Juicy Women !

Precious Juicy Women. I adore surrounding myself with Precious Juicy Women! They are so nourishing and an absolute VITAL component of my world. I'm Kallista Bolton and I've started this blog because aside from wanting to live my life "juicy", my personal mission is to INSPIRE AND EMPOWER others with my "juicy" passion, skill set and insights from life as a mum, wife, organic hobby farmer and business builder my small country town - Boddington, Western Australia. I particularly gravitate towards encouraging women so click FOLLOW to this sweet juicy blog and share in my observations of Precious Juicy Women and the traits they possess to get more "juice" into their daily lives.

I love "Sark" books (she is definatley one of my Precious Juicy Women !) and through reading her books have concluded that I have alot of "Juicy Woman" in me. I also seem to have constructed a large circle of many "Juicy Women" in my life to surround me and in fact I seek them out actively.... 


For years people have repeatedly commented about how much I "get on with" on a daily basis, my energy and my drive (my "juice"). For some time I used to get embarrassed thinking they'd see me as some sort of obsessed, hypo- bunny. However now 41, I see that these attributes are actually a source of inspiration and encouragement to many of the women around me so see this as a force for good and will use it to serve my mission. I do absolutely live my life with immense passion and momentum which has tremendous upside but does I am sure come with a cost too to those closest to me.

In this "Juicy" blog I will share revelations and observations, resources and some of the tools I and my other juicy women friends use and practice on a daily basis to try to live life juicy, squeezing as much momentum out of every day as possible. I will introduce some of my Precious Juicy Women friends and share how they are living juicy (but I'd better tell them about this first !!). So come along and click "follow" or enter your email to stay in my "Precious Juicy Women" loop and get all juiced up!